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Post by HeartBreaker on Jan 25, 2014 7:12:01 GMT -5
Dear JustUs,
Whenever I enter a relationship, I get overwhelmed with the fear of abandonment and low self esteem. I'm either accusing my mate of cheating or not showing me enough love. I want to be with them all the time and they get tired of it. My relationships become an insane rollercoaster ride. I push and pull constantly. At some point the other person gets tired of this constant back and forth and leaves the relationship. I've never been able to have a successful, normal relationship. I've hurt all the men I've loved and they've written me off as a crazy with a capital C. I don't want to be this way, but as much as I try, I don't change. I feel like I will be alone for the rest of my life. I've lost people I really cared for. My ex just told me how he really wanted us to work but I am too insecure and paranoid for him to deal with. Now I don't know what to do. Should I accept that I am not relationship material and be alone?
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Post by JustUs on Jan 25, 2014 20:11:24 GMT -5
Hello Heartbreaker,
GOD did not intended for mankind to be alone. But he also didn't mean that in a marriage / boyfriend and girlfriend kind of way. People often try to force relationships to work and that's when they rarely work. You can fellowship with people without any huge expectations and still have as much fun without the sexual commitment. Sex confuse things and that's why God, in his wisdom tell us to get married if we can't do without sex. Ask yourself, what makes you so insecure? Do you feel inadequate? It seems like to me you never learned yourself and what makes you special. When you fellowship with others you learn more about who you are. Stop speeding and take it slow, learn to love yourself. Stop thinking you need a man to define who you are. Love God and seek his wisdom then you will overcome your fears. Read psalm 23 for confidence.
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