Post by Pink on Jan 31, 2014 1:21:57 GMT -5
Hello Justus,
I'm engaged to be married soon, and I'm concerned about a commitment my fiance, "Jeff," made to his older sister "Beth." Beth is planning on having a child through a sperm donor and has asked Jeff to be a "father figure" once the child is born.
He has doubts about the wisdom of her plan to parent a child alone, but he doesn't want to hurt her feelings and is flattered to have been asked to fulfill such an important task. He agreed to do it without discussing it with me. Beth is very nice, and Jeff's family has embraced me and I don't want to cause trouble.
Jeff and I plan on having several children of our own, and we also plan to move out of state in the next few years. I am wondering how this commitment will affect that possibility.
I am uncomfortable with Jeff making a lifelong commitment to serve as a father figure to another person's child, especially when he hasn't established what it entails. I'm worried that this will cause conflict in our marriage if he goes through with it.
Am I overreacting? I know I need to discuss this with my fiance. How do you suggest I proceed?
I'm engaged to be married soon, and I'm concerned about a commitment my fiance, "Jeff," made to his older sister "Beth." Beth is planning on having a child through a sperm donor and has asked Jeff to be a "father figure" once the child is born.
He has doubts about the wisdom of her plan to parent a child alone, but he doesn't want to hurt her feelings and is flattered to have been asked to fulfill such an important task. He agreed to do it without discussing it with me. Beth is very nice, and Jeff's family has embraced me and I don't want to cause trouble.
Jeff and I plan on having several children of our own, and we also plan to move out of state in the next few years. I am wondering how this commitment will affect that possibility.
I am uncomfortable with Jeff making a lifelong commitment to serve as a father figure to another person's child, especially when he hasn't established what it entails. I'm worried that this will cause conflict in our marriage if he goes through with it.
Am I overreacting? I know I need to discuss this with my fiance. How do you suggest I proceed?
